A frustrating week.

I think I've mentioned before....I hate waiting. This is one of those weeks. Patience is necessary. As a Mom of two young kids, I'm afraid to say that, my patience is mainly used on my girls. The cancer is not worthy of my patience.

I am still waiting for some information (an appointment perhaps?) for my surgical biopsy. It's the most important test right now. It's the ONLY thing holding us back from a concrete diagnosis. Last night S phoned in the early evening to let me know that I would hear something from the surgeon's office today and if I didn't hear something today that I would hear something on Friday from on of the other nurses in Hematology. S's game plan goes something like this. CT scan tomorrow, surgical biopsy early next week, me back at the Tom Baker on Friday, and chemo the following week. I got calls today but there seems to be more confusion than anything else. The surgeon's office (receptionist who is maybe out of the loop?) told me that my appointment hinges on the CT scan results which could take 7-10 days. I tried to tell her that the surgeon doesn't require the FULL report from the CT but just needs to view to see if he can "get at" the big lymph node in my neck. She said she didn't know about that. She would call me back. I asked if we could tentatively schedule something for early next week (which was the plan...) and she said that she would try to confirm with the surgeon. Sigh. Meanwhile, the PET scan lady called me and says that they would like me in before the 21st because they close for the holidays. Great! Except that you need at least 10 days between surgery and the PET scan. Ok so that doesn't leave me very much wiggle room here. Aargh. Finally I call the nurse (did I mention that S and the Hematologist have gone to a conference until Tuesday?) that is covering for S and we go through all of the details. She says that S shouldn't have explained the plan to me as it might not be correct, meanwhile I've been going through a load of emotions thinking I was starting chemo before Christmas. GONG show.

Now I am frustrated and a bit annoyed. The waiting is bad enough but the confusion and phone calls are just getting me on edge.

Breathe.

Tomorrow is the CT scan. It's scheduled for 10:45am and I'm supposed to be there for 2.5 hours. I have to fast so I'm gonna be a grumpy gal. Grumpy but still requiring positive thoughts and energy so that the CT scan comes back without any unexpected surprises.

My Mom is here, it's helpful, but I'm still grumpy.